So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
WTF WHY ARE YOU STILL NOT DOING A BEER BONG?! THE TOILET CLOG CAN WAIT
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my drunken justification for peeing in her closet was that her shoes were ugly
Was behind a guy going 20 for 4 miles I'll be there as soon as the universe quits fucking me
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You think you're smart. You're pretending to be asleep to save yourself from my hormonal pms mood swings. Unfortunately that only works against bears.
Everyone says I win the strip club
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
Were you seriously humming twinkle twinkle little star while cupping my balls?
I figured you were on something. You're way too happy right now to be sober
It's scary that my vibrator is a dangerous weapon. I want a new one.
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