Dude im not sure whos apartment i woke up in but i just showered here and their shampoo in phenomenal
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
She's hidden vodka up her skirt and is riding a parking meter. Things can only get better
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
spending my first valentines day single in 3 years blazed and eating heart shaped brownies i bought myself. WHO NEEDS A MAN.
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
honestly performing my own hysterectomy would hurt less than my cramps right now.
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
Randomize
