Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
He was completely serious when he said my boobs were like "majestic white clouds."
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
I just typed "I've got a friend" and my phone autocompletes to "that's a dick appointment". What is my life.
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
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