Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
Just bought a breathalyzer and Sharpies, guess who thought of a new drinking game
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
please remind me of this if i ever start out a night declaring my goal is to see how much american honey it takes for me to forget who i am again
Fuck baseball, getting drunk and playing with kittens is the REAL national pasttime
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
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