At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
Passed out on a playground for a while before trying to break into the elementary school. Erica thought her captain tasted like cat food, so she poured her bottle into her cat's dish and proceeded to eat it like cereal.
You win. Erica always eats cat food.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
Thats the last time im "arresting" you to get out of paying your bar tab.
What?! The only reason I married your sister is to have a Cop in the family!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
you slapped the bag of goldfish out of her hands and screamed, "BITCH THIS AINT NO AQUARIUM". That's how fucked up
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
Randomize