omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
what's for breakfast?
Advil and throwup
We made a drinking game out of poaching eggs. When did our life turn into a really awesome version of Top Chef?
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
You got called a pussy at a party with a slow cooker, you can't let that shit slide
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
....I just did my boss
I love you. And I will hold your hand as we skip on the road to hell.
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
Randomize
