Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
We ended up debating which Food Network host would do best in porn.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
I walked into her room to find her sitting on the end of her bed with her heads in her hands talking to herself. She kept muttering things like "What? How? No. What? I don't --- How?" $10 says she's pregnant.
I'll see to your $10 and raise you $40.
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up this morning with a half eaten bagel and an empty pack of imitation crab meat in my bed. This is going to be my response to pick up lines now.
I woke up at like 4 am with an old Korean woman cuddling me. I assure you she was not there when I went to sleep.
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
sober me doesnt really want him anymore, but when drunk me takes over, she might want him, and god only knows the shit that might happen with drunk me.
Went to waffle house after dropping my sister off at school and got into a heated argument with a drunk/hungover philosophy professor I will not name. I won the argument.
Randomize