I want to buy you liquor! I want to kiss your face.
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
Truelife: I made out with my ex-boyfriend's girlfriend this weekend. Thank you Captain Morgan...
Was she wearing cherry chapstick??
No. Life's not always a fairytale.....
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
oh hey summer self, welcome to endless thirsty thursdays and walks of shame.
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
You thought you were Snapchating on your tablet, but were really just poking John Stamos' face on my Full House dvd case...
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
Just got back from a Walmart run. The music went straight from Kid Rock to John Phillip Souza. If that doesn't scream 'MURICA I don't know what will. Happy 4th!
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