I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
please dont pick me up from the airport dressed like a terrorist.
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
Well I squeegeed the puke off your arm at the gas station
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
Know what's awesome? Flying a mini helicopter while you shit.
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
There is a midget driving a powered tricycle around town. I am not drunk, stoned, or lying.
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
Success! We fucked roommates!
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
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