I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
I just found a bag of teeth...
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
a pizza costume came into my possession last night. needless to say i showed up to his house wearing only the pizza, shouting "delivery" into his window.
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
Remember when you gave their 80 year old doorman a line of molly at 5am?
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
Randomize
