That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
Do you think most people who work at an airport Chili's can pin point where their lives went wrong?
In the middle of getting a blow job, she looked up at me and said "this isn't the first time I've done this today"
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
I fill condoms, not promises.
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
We have such a parasitic relationship. But the kind where the parasite benefits from the relationship. Like the pilot fish and a shark. The fish gets the leftover food scraps from the shark and the shark gets a free bath from it.
that's so insightful.
I hooked up with a sophomore, passed out at midnight, and apparently drunkenly peed on Nicole's wedding invitation
Any chance he has an open marriage? That penis shouldn’t be wasted on one woman. It should be shared with all womankind, or at least me. I’m too good at sex to be deprived a penis that large
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
Randomize