plz talk dirty to me
Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
you drank a bottle of vodka and then while throwing up in my toilet you kept reminding me our hs reunion was in 2 yrs and it was time to start getting thin again anyway
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
He knows my period schedule but not my work schedule.
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
I walked out and he was covered in jelly, slithering around the floor. I don't know how to process that.
Last night a drunk chick tried to lick me. If you are trying to lick the zombies, you are too drunk for the haunted house.
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
Randomize