You know its bad when you're praying for a hangover just so you aren't still drunk at work anymore.
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
So, after having sex with my 4th overweight girl in 2 weeks, I've decided Charlie Sheen syndrome is ruining my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
She says she'll teach me how to make her squirt tonight so yea, I'm bailing again. I'm not sayin sorry since you don't have a better offer.
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
My TA is here with a sombrero and an entire bottle of Svedka. Skip jury duty.
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
So I don't think the seahorse breeding thing is gonna work.
That was random, even for you Mom.
Randomize