Please don't ever try giving my cat a hair cut ever ever again
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
Got cut off last night cuz this chick had her hands down my shorts and was blatantly playing with my dick while I was trying to order. apparently that's "frowned upon"
So i had a feeling this dude with one leg in a wheelchair was following me around Walmart turns out I was right. He just asked for a picture of my feet.
i mean i let him but still...
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
The next morning I found her spread eagle asleep on the living room floor and he was asleep with his head in her crotch. I needed a ride and had to wake them up.
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
Randomize
