Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
He's like my sex unicorn. Elusive and majestic. I'll catch him, I'm baiting with patron.
obviously my window is still shattered. they're pressure washing my condo today. i think i need a bloody mary.
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
Nothing ruins an orgasm faster than accidentally calling out his boss's name
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
Randomize
