is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
Midget sex pt 2 tonight
Note left in log book: "4:30am a guy was caught masturbating in the bathroom and passed out in his own juices and we had to take the door off the hinges."
You guys are open that late?
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
gladiator or hannah montana?
This is why I never have to ask who you are when I get a new phone.
Just to circumvent as much mood-killing as possible, you are allowed a small amount of laughter at my pubic hair. Too much and I revoke your vagina privileges until you can get your shit together.
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
Wife and kids came home early...naked passed out covered in chili cheese Fritos dad will haunt them forever.
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
I'm sorry that running around town like a frenetic wombat trying to find you KY jelly isn't good enough for you.
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
I'm bleeding and have questions
My father has a definite type: blonde, busty, 18-22. It was awkward when I was in college, but now I'm over it. I play wingman for him and he buys me expensive purses for the assistance in getting him hooked up with girls younger than me. Win-win.
Randomize
