everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
i found a twelve pack under my bed. and a six pack in my closet. I'm like a fucking alcoholic squirrel.
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
I just put Gatorade in my wine, cause electrolytes, you know.
Well, I'm most mad that he lied to you (about being married)...but the CAT THING IS A CLOSE SECOND
My mother just set me up with the son of the man I fucked last weekend. I could crawl under a rock and die OR I could remember the rules of genetics and hope that JR takes after daddy. Wish me luck...
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
It was all like "my feathers evolved from scales of a reptile bitches!!" and I was all like "damn this chocolate milk is AWW SOOME!"
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