lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
and she was petting her beer can
His sex texting was like a step by step guide to the most boring sex ever...
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
you sat up and said "i'm the worst kind of roommate, the drunk kind"
Dad's drunk, trying to hook me up with a 43yo, and keeps saying one and done. Mom is on the verge of tears and disowning us. You missed a good birthday dinner.
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
kind of bad when u call a cop an asshole for driving you home from the bar
Randomize
