If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
You know how my eyes change color? Well I noticed after I hook up with someone my eyes are greener.
Wow, so you're like the Edward Cullen of sluts.
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
You going out tonight?
No I am at the hospital. Throwing up blood is apparently frowned upon.
Can I get a DUI with a shopping cart? I've nearly hit 2 displays and little girl...
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
Randomize
