We're going on a mission for new porn. And ice cream.
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
I woke up this morning with my hair wrecked, a split lip, and an "H" on my right knee and a "I!" on my other knee.
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
Discovered that a nalgene holds an entire bottle of wine. Going mobile. Come find me.
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
Woke up to I'm AWESOME written in purple crayon all over my walls. I love drunk me
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
Randomize
