i will never coherently bang her
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
So he texted me two hours ago to tell me he just took two hits of acid. Now he's asking me if it's possible for a house to breathe.
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
i dunno, a lot of my childhood feels like a drugged up fever dream
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
Randomize
