chick flicks and taylor swift songs are like porn for desperate singles
just woke up. wallet empty. bottle empty. tattoo in pen on my arm. smell like bad sex. woke up alone. and wall-e is playing on my computer. need answers.
If I don't wake up snuggled up to 14 ice cream sandwiches, my life is incomplete.
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
I woke up with a stapler in my ass. Don't even complain to me.
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
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