Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
Red Bull/Vodka? You bet I'm showing everyone my penis tonight.
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there's no food at this bar, but i'm pretty sure vodka is made of wheat so i'm basically drinking bread.
He blew a load on his roommates pillow just to piss him off. Why did you introduce me to these people?
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
Today's psa: there are certain parts of your body you shouldn't scratch while wearing fake nails.
you just tore your cootch a new one, didn't you?
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
This drunk girl kept yelling for water so I dipped a cup in the toilet and gave it to her. She was thanking me all night.
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