Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
Walked into this guys room, saw a tickle me elmo under his desk with white stains in its mouth. This is awkward.
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
20 yrs from now I just want to barge in her house and yell at her kids, "I took ur moms virginity!"
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
Nothing says "I mean business" like using a cart at the liquor store.
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
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