distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
i just ran into our bio chem professor at the bar. apparently, he doesn't follow the "no slapping your students' asses" rule.
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
Are you in a cab?
I'm close- can you order me a bowl of vodka?
they lined up to high five me when i got taken out by the stretcher. The paramedic high fived them too
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
On that note if you see a hobo smiling with a pack of cigarettes and an AMP energy drink, that was my good deed for the day
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
You know that feeling when you wake up and your whole body just smells like a penis?
I'm topless, wearing a fur coat, stink of sex, and eating dim sum. 2015 is off to a great start.
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
Randomize
