No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
I just got cut off for correcting the bartender's grammar. I should have never accepted that fucking editors position.
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
Do you think I could convince a doctor that my uterus is poisoning me? It wouldn't technically be a lie. It does more harm than good.
She just broke into my apartment while I was asleep, woke me up and drunkenly tried to seduce me for about 2 minutes, then passed out..
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
Just shared a bacon biscuit with my cat.... Life is weird for me right now
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
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