The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
I know. I know. The man who pulled me from my mother's womb was the same man who had his fingers in my vagina today. My life is a joke. I don't know how to feel about this.
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
I just used my VA prescription bottle of xanax to get a military discount at the liquor store. I win.
Only you could get away with that.
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
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