he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
I've been at work 30 min broke a paper towel holder a chair set a box on fire and fell down twice. Hungover Brian just reached a new level
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
Hey, umm this is awkward but I want to apologize in case you find gum in your pubes. Not sure if I swallowed it or spit it out. It's all a blur.
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
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