Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards?
ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
On blowjobs: "If you decide to go there, you finish the job. No complaining." I don't care if it sounds like she's talking about Iraq, I'm in love.
i just recognized the girl sitting across from me from a lesbian porno... should i ask for an autograph?
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
Sorry for trying to baptize you last night
You knew the entire thing in Latin I was so impressed
She was blowing me like a porn star and all I could think was "you just told me your grandfather is dying in hospice right now"
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
Randomize