i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
this morning i realized i came home with more condoms then i left. burn.
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
I'm just that drunk tells people I love them or wants to set them on fire. Accept that.
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
The cat hopped on my bed and watched me masturbate naked with a vibrator. I've never felt more sorry in my entire life
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