you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
After giving the pizza guy directions you told him to look for the big stupid looking kid outside in purple
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
I think I kinda scared him when I told him if he premature ejaculated I would punch him in the throat.
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
He was so drunk last night. He woke up out of a dead sleep at 330am, walked over to the dresser, opened his middle drawer and proceeded to pee. When I woke up and asked him Wtf he was doing, he told me it was fake pee and blamed it on the cat...we don't have a cat
Wakes up in a cold sweat at 3am, 136 unread messages and the preview on the notification is "I JUST GOT TO THE INCEST PART"
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