Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
i feel like my eyelids need a kick stand.
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
Your dad just texted me? He said I needed to holler at him when I get up tomorrow. I honestly thought you had somehow gone to jail.
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
Who'd have thought a guy with a lisp would be so good with his tongue?
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
That was right around the time that the drunken mess pulled out his dick in front of myself and like 10 other people and started peeing all over the train platform while saying, "Sometimes a bear gets you brother. Sometimes a bear gets you."
Pretty standard Thursday night commute for you, no?
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
I woke up handcuffed to a bed wearing nothing but an army belt. Does this count as thanking our country?
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