I have a new suitor he got my # last nite... I was to tipsy to function! What was I thinking!! It's like u when u first met me
ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
Every time I stand up, gravity punches me in the tits. This is horrible.
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
I took your mattress from your bed. Don't ask questions. Love you. See ya later.
it's like the easy bake oven version of plastic surgery
She was blacked out at her own party. It felt good to stand next to her while she laid on the floor and say "vomit does not look good on you."
Randomize
