i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
Just had a 40 min argument about how many celebrity guest appearances on Sesame Street were court ordered for DUIs.
I swear to God, if you drunkenly correct my grammar one more time, I'm cutting you off.
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
Randomize
