Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
she got kicked out of the bar for shoving german chocolate cake in the bartenders face. we were there less than a minute
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
I accidentally peed all over the couch. It's safe to say I'm not welcome at that house anymore
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
Cleaning my room at 2am, in just one corner I found six beers, half a pint of whiskey, my flask, 2 shotgun bullets, my crown and shimmer lotion.
I took out the emergency phone in the elevator and replaced it with a bottle of vodka. The game is simple, do a shot for the number of the floor you're going to. Best suggestion box tip ever.
Just watched a middle age white woman scream WHY DON'T YOU GO FUCK YOURSELF, HELEN?! Helen seemed absolutely scandalized.
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
Just as an add on, don't expect me to wear matching bra and underwear. If I do, I'm probably drunk and it's your fucking birthday. Have a great night.
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize
