sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
Just saw a hooker eating a pastrami sandwich walking down beach blvd blowing kisses to traffic. My day = made
Also, they sell weed-chocolate covered strawberries. For the romantic stoner.
That was one of the best texts I got today
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
WHICH HOTEL??
Randomize
