so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
I got asked if I was pregnant as a pickup line
Maybe walking up to the cops busting our party with a "Things go better with Coke" t-shirt on and asking for my extra license back that my little brother got busted with wasn't the best idea of the night.
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
Why the hell did you smack that girls beer out of her hand at the end of the night then buy her a double jack and coke for?
Its called bad cop laid cop.
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
You're going to find someone that you love very much and that loves you, and then you're gonna find an additional person that you literally can't stop staring at from across the room. I feel very confidently about that
Randomize
