S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
My mom and dad are smoking a joint while lecturing me on what to bring and how to act in Europe. I'll finish this glass of wine and head over.
Attn every girl I've slept with in the past 26 years of my life. One of you cunts gave me herpes. This is the 4th of 5 group MMS. That's right. It's in the 50s. There are two girls I don't have #s for. One was on a cruise and the other was a prostitute in Amsterdam. So which of you has herpes?
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
There's that certain point at night when you start saying things like s'mores should be used in foreign relations. I reached it.
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
I can't remember the last time I saw a penis in person that I didn't see a million times on text first
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
Also, apparently I'm only coherent when I'm drunk sexting. And then I'm grammatically perfect and impressively eloquent.
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
Randomize
