well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
Just barfed in my hand. Needless to say, this day is off to a great start
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
He picked me up from the airport wearing nothing but a trench coat and a bow on his dick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just had a heart to heart with a stripper I'm becoming a dentist.
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
BITCH I AM EXPERIENCING THE FEMININE MYSTERY SHUT UP AND GIVE ME DRUGS
I think I gave a random lady a dildo
Again?!
someone at the bars was yelling at the bouncer to let him in because he "just passed through the 7 levels of the candy cane forrest" soulmate?
go meet him and give him your number.
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
Legit just heard the bartender tell some Dude "Penis is not an accepted currency in this establishment" and Dude responded "You take Vagina then?"
Randomize