They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
martini and pecan pie.. breakfast of champions.
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
I always ask when they're due. It's the nicest way for me to let her know the rest of the world can tell she's putting on weight too
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
We got signed out of jail by an Uber driver. I think that qualifies as a great first night of college
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
Pretty sure the waitress here is concerned about well being bc I've been here drinking by myself for 3 hours. If only I could show here FB so she'd know I'm not alone...
I made out with the uber driver for free weed, I thought he deserved it
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
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