So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
I'm pouring my heart out in these texts and you're going around showing everyone???
they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
Watch the news tonight. They interviewed me about a fire. I was high as balls so it should be entertaining.
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
I'm in too deep with Breaking Bad. I realized I've altered my Tinder likes to people that either look like Jesse or work in a school's Science department.
I nicked my vulva while shaving and I'm about to go on a date where I will be having sex. Which bandaid: My Little Pony or princesses?
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
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