He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia
I swear, if I find out you're lying, I'm going to put your name on one of those herpes watch websites and put the link up on every social networking site in existence.
i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
Hey, I can't get ahold of Tommy. Let him know his ex-girlfriend is pregnant.
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
so the casino kicked my ass last night, i'm pretty sure i hit a new level of hungover....just showered with my sunglasses on because the bathroom light is too bright
Randomize
