For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
she spent the whole night flailing her arms because "primates are the only species who can move their arms like that and we shouldn't waste it"
Hey, did you take me to hospital last night?
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
I just spent the last ten minutes making a timeline of my sex life. 2010 and 2011 I am calling "I can't believe Im still clean" years.
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
which one of you assholes put my new jeans down the garbage disposal?!
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
You have the most beautiful penis I've ever seen. I never thought penises were meant to be beautiful, but you proved me wrong
FYI bail money is still in my drawer. I know you have no car but you need to know this for tomorrow.
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