We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
I'm gonna have bed sores at the end of this hangover.
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
new level of vanity: sex dreams about deep throating myself...
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
Sorry blacked out and lost my phone. Judging by the looks of my body I fought a cat and fell into a bush.
Last night I had sex with one of the groomsmen I was in the wedding with. In a stairwell. 13 years my senior. Thinking I should retire from the bridesmaid gig.
Chipotle just hit me... I want to go sit in the corner of the shower and cry until morning.
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
All I want for my birthday to be fingered and eat pizza
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
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