I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
I have a fruit stripe tattoo on my penis. You're the only person I know who chews that gum.
I think I just agreed to be an escort for an Asian guy who's gonna be in the city next weekend before he moves back to Shanghai...
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
And literally 4loko margaritas are callin my name. They're like "Hey girl come on over here I'll make you forget about grades and boys and it'll be a good idea to send everyone 55 snapchats of your cleavage" ok
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
Yeah ok. We can maid of honor each other since you don't like my boobs enough to lesbian marry me
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
This can only be settled by a dance off.
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