I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
i just spit dirty mouth water on my dentist. and apparently grinning sheepishly and saying "my b" doesn't make it better
just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
I just remember telling jokes while vomitting
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
I just don't want to have to pretend at every family function she brings him to that he didn't hit on me first
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
DOMA is dead. I'm definitely going to be the last of our friends to get married now.
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
The ONLY reason I am doing laundry is because all my sweatpants are dirty.
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
Randomize
