Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
dude i woke up to 20 missed calls from you, 3 from a blocked number and had 13 voicemails that all said "send me a picture of your tits."
so im guessing thats a no.....
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
I just gave the bartender my number in roman numerals. If she figures it out, she's worth a shot
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
It's like we come as a package. Your slogan should be "be in my family, sleep with my roommate."
My slogan can be "bonding the family together. One dick at a time."
Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
There was a slutty maid costume on the floor when I woke up, but the house was trashed. Either she's been fired or got promoted, I'm not sure which.
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
Randomize
