I wish I only lived at night.
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
I woke up with the new contact "Britney Both Nipples Pierced"... how do you think the night went?
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
I miss you more than I would miss junk food if I went on a diet. And you've seen me eat, you know how desperate I'd be.
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
So I ate half a jar of mayo because I thought it would cure a hangover. I thought wrong.
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
I'm sorry I missed your birthday brunch. If it makes you feel any better I woke up wearing someone else's toga and a sombrero
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