Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
Why I am the classiest girl you know: just mixed drinks for everyone on the baby changing station at the movie theater.
Its like im going on a blind date, but ive already had sex with her
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
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apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
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walk of shame into the pharmacy with a busted up chin and laughing the lady at the counter rolled her eyes at me when I asked for the morning after pill.
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
Please come over. It's a pajama and burn-2016-in-effigy party
I'm gonna write a book entitled "when you give a cop a cookie..."
I don't even want to know.
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