i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
Old men and throwing up are my life now.
I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
sorry for covering your dog in whipped cream. his bark made it sound like he wanted it.
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
I should start handing out wavers before I have sex with someone. 1. Do you have anything to do tomorrow? 2. Are you ok with sleeping 12 hours from exhaustion. 3. Are you ok with a limp?
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
He showed up at my house with roses and a bottle of vodka... to watch a movie. obvi i took the vodka and didn't sleep with him
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
Randomize
